Monday 1 June 2015

Dungeon Masters and Drone Strikes


The most common question for any creative person is: ‘Where do your ideas come from?’ Right on track with this is the other most common question: ‘Where do you get your inspiration?’ If you ever find yourself interviewing any creative person, do them a favor and avoid asking these kinds of questions because there are only three possible answers; the most common being ‘They come from God.’ The second is ‘I haven’t a clue.’ And the third: ‘I’m a creative genius, now go and bring me a sandwich.’ Of course there is a fourth one and the one I try to use when responding to such banal lines of questioning, and that is ‘Drone strike.’ I use this mainly because it seems to be the popular answer to most questions these days. The truth is that most of my ideas come from Dungeons and Dragons.

When I was younger I played a lot of two things: guitar and D&D. Most of the time I ended up as the Dungeon Master – which is the person who makes up the story line of the campaign, places beasties in a appropriate locations and then turns them loose on the hapless characters. Sound familiar? Yep, it’s exactly what authors do. Dungeon Mastering is prime training ground for budding authors. I heartily recommend that college level creative writing classes start including DM-ing in their curriculum and here’s why.

The DM has to outline the plot but by no means are events going to turn out like the DM plans, much like a novel. The most interesting (and challenging) part is that each character is played by a real life person. That means that things like this happen:
            DM: “At the end of the passageway is a ‘T’ junction. To the right it goes down about twenty feet and ends in a golden door, to the left it goes about twenty feet and open in a cliff face which plummets several thousand feet to a river of lava. What do you do?”
            Half-elf ranger: “I throw the dwarf at the door, breaking it off then jump off the cliff with the dwarf and the door. Using the door as a surf board I ride down the river of lava to enter the dragon’s lair by the back entrance where we sneak in and steal the stone of Alkabrekablech and skedaddle before the dragon wakes up.”
            DM: Okay, slow down – first the dwarf throwing. Roll and seventeen or more.”
            Dwarf fighter: “Wait a second here. I knock the ranger out, feed him to the dragon then steal the stone while he’s busy munching.”

Thank you mister Dwarf. My point exactly. Anything can happen and, to be sure, most probably will. As a matter of fact, just like in life, the most probable thing that happens is usually the thing you never would have thought of.
Now I’m sure that you’re thinking “Well why don’t people just record D&D sessions to write books?” and the answer is: they do! And to see the result, I refer you to a Jim C. Hines article on the subject: http://terribleminds.com/ramble/2014/12/02/jim-c-hines-how-to-turn-your-dd-campaign-into-a-really-bad-novel/

Okay so the campaign itself may not result in a great story but it makes good practice. So all you budding writers out there grab a dice pack, sixteen bags of Doritos, forty liters of Mountain Dew and lock yourself in the basement with a few friends for a weekend of D&D! And if you’re a creative professional and you ever get asked where you get your ideas from, remember: drone strike, it’s the American answer to everything.

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